daughter

One hand is on my swelling belly, it is Sunday morning and we are laying in bed, the sun has yet to rise as I am trying to explain to you how I felt the night we met. It was just this feeling, I tell you, that now I was found. I guess it was love at first site, if that is how love at first site feels. The date that we had met was six years earlier than this day. It was at a bar in New York City. I was supposed to be on a plane, but I had switched my flight due to other circumstances. I had dropped by my friend Briana’s apartment before the party. Her roommate, Kate, was a practicing beautician. She wanted to try some new product in my hair “Sex kitten hair” she described it as she manipulated the wax through my shoulder length hair. We rode uptown to the bar from all the way downtown in a bus together. It was one of those nights, everyone we know was there. It was karaoke night. I downed a few and felt like a Rock star. I was wearing a new shirt, I had “sex kitten” hair. I bounced up on this little platform and sing the back up vocals to “Welcome to the Jungle” all is good. Then these guys show up that I had met a few weeks earlier that both claimed to like my friend and not me. I had stupidly invited them earlier in the day, as I did this other guy that I had gone out on blind date with. Luckily the blind date guy had rejected my offer, but these two had shown up to ogle at my friend. I had a few more and then go into the bathroom, the depression of all the alcohol starts to set in as does my current dating situation or lack thereof one. I try to make myself happy, it is Friday night, I’m wearing a new shirt and have sex kitten hair, why be sad? I unlock the bathroom door with the notion of starting anew. I hear the sounds of “Daughter” by Pearl Jam, being belted by some new karaokiers. I look at the little platform. And there he was, there you were. My heart just felt comforted as I saw you. Your height and appealing stature attracted me to you. Your smile and demeanor as you flailed your arms and belted out that iconic tune. The guy you were with looked familiar. Is that Paul, I ask my friend, the guy you’re dating? Yes she says. Who is the guy he’s with? I don’t know I’ve never seen him before. As the song ends, and you walk off stage, I strategically place myself in front of you and introduce myself. Your voice and dry wit solidify my initial feeling, my initial attraction. Because you got a ride in with your friend who wants to spend the night with my friend, I’m “stuck” taking you home with me. We stay up all night watching my student films and talking. At 4 am, it is time to go to bed. I allow you to sleep fully clothed in my twin size bed. You do, with one hand gently on my side. In the morning we talk about clouds. You leave me you email and phone number. 4 years later we marry, 6 years later I am pregnant with your daughter. It was just that feeling of seeing you and now I get to experience that feeling every day.